yipee! I'm back :)

I read my last post myself and I really saw how unbalanced I was! Lots of concerns were shown and questions were asked by my well wishers and my dearest friends and now I think Its time to patch-up :P my loose talk.

Seriously, I lost my mind for quite sometime as I had bad arguments at home this sunday by which I felt that I was overpowered by monstrous brutal ruthless rules just to hinder my freedom.

I was hugely wrong in saying that I had not made friends as I saw the caring reactions from dear ones soon after posting my last eccentric post.

In the about me section I had said - A "balanced strong mind" in an athletic body. When one of my friend asked if this really suited you? I pondered a lot! to know my ignorance.

Thanks for all those who lent their ears to me and helped me come out of the situation.
Never in my life again I want to be so depressed and I am really sorry for the ones I hurt during the course of time. Hope you understand me.

ssssorry soooory sorrrry sorryyyyy ;)

I promise to be always Laughing and smiling :) yipee! I'm back!

Fmylife!

People nowadays are so busy that they don't have time not even just to think of themselves.

You can call me selfish or the guy who has no work to do or gone nuts! But I always ask myself questions like - Why am I like this? What is wrong with me? How do I spend the rest of my life the best way that I can?

To be frank, I feel lonely most of the time and I am! Even though I stay together with my family, the word together is merely physical because I sense there is no mentally a good healthy bondage in my family even though I participate in this institution. I shouldn't be the one complaining/revealing about all my personal stuff but I feel this as the perfect outlet for my emotions and I don't even know how rudely I am jotting it down or how many of them I am hurting in writing this! I have been crying a lot within me that nobody notices. It hasn't turned so worst as any suicidal instinct or anything but I do feel a lot insecure even at home. Where else do I find comfort? Don't ask me to meet a psychiatrist as I have been thorough this my entire life till now, me being only closest friend of myself. I resolved into all kinds of music, books, movies-illusions of real life and what not but its all temporary diversion to feel I'm still alive. Everyone needs someone to share your feelings with, to fight with, to love, to care, to feel happy for, to be happy with.

I know that the relations that come through the blood cannot be chosen! But neither have I made really close friends whom I can share the feelings that even I don't trust telling it to my parents.

I DO WANT to live my life happily as possible and have always been in the pursuit of that happyness (with a 'y'). I have practiced and learnt to live lonely life which I know is not a socially good way of being a human being but I have been fighting to overcome it ever since I find a little bit of freedom in my way.

I don't know why even at the age of 22 I still am treated as a 13 yr old adolescent! by my parents. To be precise, I am not allowed to take decisions on my own when they are parents around! Why all the nose poking with my life even after I have started to earn my living? Why parenting when we can take care of ourselves? Always trying to force what they couldn't achieve in their life. Not letting me be somebody different. I hate them when they don't trust me. Won't they ever know that I never gonna let them down. All that I expect them is to wish me that my dreams of life never take me out or turn bad and leave me to achieve it. I feel this whole world is mine to fulfill my dreams whatever they are.

I don't know why I have become such a nerd, a geek now but as a kid I was rather forced to take up studies so seriously that I barely remember participating or rather was never allowed to participate in any extra-curricular-activities that I was so much interested in. I regret for all the things I lost in my childhood just to be a product called "yet-another-software-engineer". There are so many ways of earning a living in this world and I have realized it after seeing the industry for about an year sustaining the heat of financial crisis around. Why is that my career was chosen when I was a kid? I want peace in my life rather than running behind money.

Given a choice, I don't want to be what I am right now. I am pretty sure most of them don't want too! as everyone feels grass is always green on the other side.

I don't know many youngsters are suffering similar plight! but so is my F**ked up life! (I had never ever used the F word even with ** in my blog till now)

Seriously! Where are we heading to?

There are certain important things that the current financial situation has made me think of, seriously!

We are all listening to the words like financial crisis, liquidity , recession very often these days and we all only fear of one thing - "How bad can it affect me!?" A few posts back, I had quoted that only "talented literates" can survive this doom, but my next question was - "What about the rest of them?"

I say the problem is all because of "Engineer population explosion"! Didn't get it quite right?
Let me explain - 3 decades back there were 5-8 engineering colleges per state and now there are more than 200-300 colleges! Churning out on an avg 50000 engineers per year which turns out to be a excess of engineers "on bench" and many even unemployed.

A middle-class family like ours will think of making a fortune in "creating" a software/electronics/mechanical brand product called engineer rather than letting himself to make a living in other low earning professions. Rather, the damn politics in this country and unhealthy reservations in all competitive exams force us to choose and be a part of the IT world of MNC's as they are free from all these.

Forced by the US markets and baseless future trends, the "new born engineer" is forced to work in so damn good projects like developing smart-phones which use symbian/android! Vlsi Chips with integrated HDTV-out, Bluetooth, wifi, FM, camera and what not all on the same chipset! Quad/Octa/Decahexa/ (nonsense) cores for gaming consoles!, All touch interface screen innovations!, Chipsets for showing the numerical display of odometer, speedometer and fuel gauge! He is fascinated by the work/project he involves and he is happy till he gets paid with all the perks ;)

Previously it was necessity which was the driving cause but now its changed to -"Laziness is the mother of all invention". People need gadgets to do everything for them. No doubt it makes life easy but there needs to be a limit for this Idiocracy. Have you ever thought of the number of brands and models of cell-phones in the market now? It will exceed the number of people in the world in few years or it may have already exceeded! We must be having enough number of host PC's and Laptops in this world to exceed the IP address range itself. Do you even use all the features that your cell phone provides atleast once in your lifetime? but yet the market sees a future! how and why?

Instead we need to innovate on something useful to humanity, like cost-effective solar energy trapping systems using mosfets and inverters, Effective farming with current technology, Fuel saving alternatives in cooking and travel, superconductors at room temperatures and levitation, LED lights for street lamps and torches, Eco-friendly houses, Recycling of waste water, Rainwater harvesting. Its time to go back to the basics, food-clothing-shelter-water.

I have started doing my part by commuting to office via cycling regularly. There is rainwater harvesting scheme, We have implemented at our house which partially works. I cook most of the times using microwave to save energy as it is efficient than heating up vessel unnecessarily. I preach only after testing feasibility and lots of practice :) Its the little things that makes life great!

In my opinion, the market is just driving people crazy.. and the already crazy people promote it even more!
Was there really a market for small cars in letting the tata nano out? How many middle-class families are going to invest on a car at this time of crisis? I am sure its going into the hands of Richie rich kid's and politician teen-kid's as a toy! Adding more to the traffic and pollution, the situation will worsen soon.

People need to understand that there are other professions too to choose a career and stop working on becoming yet another branded product themselves!
I read this somewhere - "If you throw a stone at the streets of Bangalore, It is sure either to hit a dog or an engineer!"
So wanna be yet another one who gets hurt? ;)

Operation Manyatha

I always say - "People should have at-least one craze for keeping themselves alive, not as in breathing-air-alive but something like happy-contented-motivated-energetic-alive" :)

Okay, here I go. On evening of this good Friday, I had this crazy idea to commute daily by cycling to office which is at Manyatha embassy tech park and that's the reason why I choose this deluxe title of the post!

To test the feasibility of the above and start this Operation as a successful one, I took the test ride starting from home straight to the office on Saturday evening at 4:00 pm. The cycle was in good shape even after my 80+ kms of pedal-a-thlon :P, a few months back. Inflating of the tires was all that the "food" that it needed this time.

Ears plugged with the I-pod touch speakers which was buzzing the top 25 songs played on it, I traveled in the hot sun which was shining so mercilessly even after mid-noon! As my heart raced (but below the limits :P) It pumped more blood to my brain and amplified my thoughts after a few kms of cycling! I looked back and asked myself..The very 1st question on your mind too by now ;)

What am I going to achieve by commuting on a Saturday evening, just to the gates of office and coming back for about 15 kms of round trip travel without a drop of water with me?

I don't know the reason - What! Why!, But I enjoyed giving a mocking smile at the petrol bunks in my OWN cycle(The first thing I bought from my salary!) where I usually get my bro's bike or my dad's car refueled.

I spread the awareness to use fuel free alternatives and it was like a solo-campaign to save the world from air pollution and depleting natural resources :'( Hope everyone implements it sooner before the D-day arrives.
Having said about pollution, I regret to say that I have found so many plastic bottles, covers and sachets thrown all around the beautiful mountain terrains while trekking.
I learnt from one of our guides during Kerala trip, a few years back, who himself picked up all plastic to put it in nearby dustbin while trekking. No doubt about the literacy rate there.
This reminds me of the quote - "We do not inherit the earth from our ancestors. We borrow it from our children."

Coming back to the cycling, I took the service roads to escape the yamadhooth-like Leyland trucks and for safer journey. They was lot of rush and parking problem that people were facing near Lumbini gardens at Nagawara as it is a new place for holiday outing within the city limits. Dodging all the traffic I came to my office and It is more farther than I expected. Total round trip to-n-fro home costed about 15 kms of pedaling. It took a total of 45 mins and I was back at home by 4:45pm. It was pretty fast indeed!

I will make it a exercise/habit to take this seriously and continue my good deed :D Hope I will keep myself fit till next weekend to say whether "Operation Manyatha" was a success or failure ;)

Cheers,
Karthik Bharadwaj H

Its hard to become a literate! but not impossible.

"The Illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write but those who cannot learn, unlearn and relearn"
-Alvin Toffler
I read this quote some time back and I still can't get it off my head as it made me really think a lot.

In this ever-new technological era, it seems to be so true. It is only the knowledge/innovation that keeps the people/industry moving ahead.

As a Software Engineer, I was wondering how does it apply to me! and without any surprise I realized that it impacts me, a very big time. In this time of recession with all the job cuts, only the really "talented literates" can survive in an industry.

The next question that I raised to myself was.. Am I one of them? I'm not productive yet at the new Co and I am very much in probation. I need to redeem myself that I am worthy for the given position. Of-course they saw something within me when they took the interviews and So its all up-to me to prove my ability.

Ramp-up in new technology domain, I feel like a child learning how to relate things to his previous experiences and coming to an understanding, though it may be wrong from its perception! (You can't teach a child about hotness of a flame until he himself experiences it!) Learning very new thing is something easier compared to unlearning deformed concepts in your mind. Really it is hard to unlearn something you strongly believe in and change it. All our learning is based on some rules. We create a map/network of ideas starting from accepted facts/axioms. Unknowingly this network becomes so huge that our brain cells gets so much wired-up and the rewiring takes its own toll!

Knowing half is more dangerous than knowing nothing. This is exactly what the current universities has done to many pathetic students. All the special thanks to my curricular books at university which taught me nothing practical about current technology! All the syllabus books start with organization of PC, 8085, then x86! learn basics of C, partial knowledge of system software and that's it.. I ended up in such a great position that I was no special to a graduate who passed out 10 years back!

Now having learnt everything the hard way, I refer to standards, specifications and Google/Wiki out latest information and that's the only way to get knowledge of current technology.
"Be flexible in process of being cognitive"

"Coming back to life"(pink floyd) after "winds of change"(scorpions)

Its a long time since I blurted something "gibberish" here. So here I'm back with some more updates/changes in my motion picture called life ;)

After reviewing a few of my previous posts, I don't know why I chose to write about "love is in the air" thingy of Mr.X. Maybe it was an effect of V-day around the corner :P

Many of my posts have surprisingly turned out to be travelogues for wonderful journey that are indeed memorable! It gives me great pleasure in reading them to live those beautiful days again and cherish them for a short while.

I had put a long break to blogging and me writing chikka-chota-small words that rhyme :) .. so called poetry! because there was lot of disturbing phases that I had to undergo over last two months. By disturbing, I mean there were lots of changes in life and the Inertia within me took a toll! But this recession has turned to be somewhat good for me. I changed my job (or rather forced to since I feared my old Co. was closing down!) and surprisingly to my luck/hard-work, I found a great opportunity to work for Alcatel-Lucent. I am happy with my new work and time saved in my commute(just 5-6 kms) to my office now.

Many advised me to take up higher studies and I didn't yield my brain for their detergent-less washing. :P Maybe I will regret this for not taking their experienced suggestions as they too have trodden the same path in which I am heading in the career, But I think I wont. I want myself to be cause for all right or wrong decisions that I take in my life and face its consequences. Wow! The last statement made me think of Kareena's dialogue in movie "Jab we met", while talking to Shahid on top of their house while escaping.. :)

Coming back to reality after movie flashback, Well.. Its was just 3 days I had spent at new Co, I needed a break last weekend and set out to another expedition.. one of my my favorites! Yeah you guessed it right - trekking again! during Ugadi. This time It was to Kodachadri hills with college gang. A splendid sunset view from the top indeed. We were sailing over the clouds just like in an aeroplane! I was not the usual me during the trip.. The "aftermath" of changing the job and getting adjusted to the new environment had a long lasting effect even during the trip for sometime till I tried hard to overcome it. Sorry guys for my moody behavior during last weekend. I hope you understand me.

You can Google out for wonderful travel blogs about Kodachadri - trekking path that we chose was one of the hardest ones about 14-16kms starting from Nitturu near kollur-small Marakutaka bus stop - Hidhlumane Falls(7 stepped falls) - Kodachadri. You can call "Sitaram Jogi" for accommodation @ 9242281932, 9480130939 for booking rooms food etc., There are jeeps available which can only tread the worst paths all the way uphill if you reach Kollur. Around 20kms from kodachadri for 1500 bucks! Not at all worth.. as you enjoy beautiful nature more on foot than the hump-ty dumpty roads. Also beware, you wont find much network coverage at the top except for very few service providers.
Don't worry, I'm not going to share full trek experience here.. as posting it over and over again leads to indigestion for the whole of blogosphere. :P

After breaking the sweat out of my forehead for a day or two, I am back at the mundane work breaking my head over the new domain. But I like networking. It is nice to learn something new and contribute to the technology/product in which you are more interested in. Nothing more I will reveal, its all confidential stuff.. hush hush ;)

After swallowing the "Red pill" in switching(again a networking terminology, you know why!) of job, I miss my friends at Freescale a lot. It was a wonderful time that I had. Its was all fun and frolic with less work ;) We were one hell of a boisterous crowd! Hope we continue meeting at our hangouts/trips during weekends.

Signing off now.

Cheers,
Karthik Bharadwaj H