In India, as Chetan bhagat's latest novel says, Indian weddings are not like other love marriages around the world - Boy loves girl. Girl loves boy. Boy's famliy has to love girl. Girl's family has to love boy. Girl's family has to love boy's family. Boy's family has to love girl's family. If girl and boy still love each other(after all the turbulent-highly-emotional-melodrama between the families) then they can get married :D
The argument with my friend ignited over the assumption that I am not a strong believer of love marriages! Actually I am happy being single now. I have lots of time to spare on things which I have cool passion. Some people think I am crazy teetotaler owning a royal enfield bullet which seems to be like practicing two contrasting customs in the world. I am happy exploring the world around me. I am happy at work and looking ahead for a great career in which I am certainly making good progress. I am contented with all that I got except for knowledge. To me I am the most happiest person on this world! I love myself than any other person in this world. I have not (yet) met that someone who I can back on/whom I back on emotionally with all the care in the world.
Coming to argument of love marriages v/s arranged marriage, a dozen points/questions I listed are here :)
1. Arranged marriages are like contracts and one should spend life in fulfilling it.
2. Being in love doesn't mean losing freedom.
3. Parents have come a long way from 19th century and today individuals matter rather than caste, creed, religion.
4. Love marriages give you ample time before hand in choosing the right person.
5. Can't you fall in love with your partner after marriage?
6. Is it worth taking the risk to try bonding a relationship of feelings after marriage?
7. What if love is just a kind of euphoria which blinds you from his/her real truth?
8. How much is sufficient time to know a person beforehand to fall in love with?
9. What do you see in a person to fall in love?
10. Does one really have time to find that special someone in the midst of finding a career and work-pressure?
11. Does love happen only once in lifetime!?
12. Does love/arranged really matter after a few years of any kind-of marriage? ( since I see all couples fighting over taking care of kids, doing daily chores in kitchen and even buying groceries which get rotten in refrigerator!? :P )
Actually in this debatable topic, someone had to take each side otherwise there would be nothing to chat and discuss about :P so I unfortunately took "against" and landed up in position where I couldn't put-forward my argument sometimes irritating/leg-pulling my friend and going off topic. But that was hell lot of churning out our minds.
So awaiting for comments from other readers and their typical-middle-class-Indian views on the same ;)
1. Arranged marriages are like contracts and one should spend life in fulfilling it.
2. Being in love doesn't mean losing freedom.
3. Parents have come a long way from 19th century and today individuals matter rather than caste, creed, religion.
4. Love marriages give you ample time before hand in choosing the right person.
5. Can't you fall in love with your partner after marriage?
6. Is it worth taking the risk to try bonding a relationship of feelings after marriage?
7. What if love is just a kind of euphoria which blinds you from his/her real truth?
8. How much is sufficient time to know a person beforehand to fall in love with?
9. What do you see in a person to fall in love?
10. Does one really have time to find that special someone in the midst of finding a career and work-pressure?
11. Does love happen only once in lifetime!?
12. Does love/arranged really matter after a few years of any kind-of marriage? ( since I see all couples fighting over taking care of kids, doing daily chores in kitchen and even buying groceries which get rotten in refrigerator!? :P )
Actually in this debatable topic, someone had to take each side otherwise there would be nothing to chat and discuss about :P so I unfortunately took "against" and landed up in position where I couldn't put-forward my argument sometimes irritating/leg-pulling my friend and going off topic. But that was hell lot of churning out our minds.
So awaiting for comments from other readers and their typical-middle-class-Indian views on the same ;)
3 comments:
Hey HB,
Love vs Arranged ??
You have taken a really happening topic..As I understand it , it is not just marriage between 2 persons..It is bonding between families ,culture etc..It is the FUTURE..
Our parents , relatives , friends and wellwishers have a lot of hope on you..And they have gone through this process already once :P
So they are better judges than us..
And most of the 'Love' marriage are failure in comparision to arranged..
Arranged are not 100% foolproof..But with emotional support of families they will sustain..But today's youth are largely impressed by the "MEDIA" , which is misguiding them in shaping their views about marriages ..Arranged marriages are shown in darker side..
Arranged love marriages will suffice if you believe in both school of thoughts :P
-HRK
And one more thing..There is some amount of 'THRILL' involved in love..It will fuel further in the process of love..But once you are married with that person then the 'FUEL' will no longer be available as all the "thrill" is gone..So the engine comes to a halt..
And mostly love is due to attraction of opposite sex..It is the hormones which control us then..And after certain age hormones are gone :P..
Before marriage lovers hardly spend time together in a day i.e. around 4 hrs/day..But once married you have to spend 24 hrs/day..So the real 'YOU' will be popping out..
-HRK
Whoa! How come Rampa is suddenly thinking of so much after engineering!? :P You should have used it more in VTU maga ;)
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