Today evening, my mom was watching the opening of the movie named "Me and my dream"(Naanu.. nanna kanasu), a remake of tamil movie "Abhiyum naanum". Several actors were made to read out letters to their young kids about love and care for their little daughter which is the basic theme of the movie, A dad giving all that he can to his lovely daughter. Mom (as always!) being highly emotional and sensitive was taken back to her childhood memories and those old day memories just flashed by her eyes. Mom and I, being close friends, She shared her childhood story with me.
This story is two generations older and hence may seem very unrealistic to some but happening in all our lives.
Story line starts somewhere in 1960's when mom was in her school days. She was the latest addition to grandpa's family, I mean really late coz she was completing her tenth grade when grandpa retired at the age of 58 years! Hmmm... seems like no family planning soon after independence :P Well, If it was there I wouldn't have been here to say this ;)
It was a family of 8 people; Grandpa, his mother, Grandma, two aunts and two uncles elder to mom and my mom. They all lived happily in a posh villa in the area known as Malleshwaram. Even today it is being called the same after decades of development in Bangalore. To me atleast some places like Gandhi bazaar, DVG road of Basavanagudi, MG road in central Bangalore, 8th cross of Malleshwaram, Jayanagar 4th block hangouts should remain the same even after centuries.
Is there something like lived-happily-ever-after as in fairy tales!? Nope certainly not, coz this is real life. Betrayal, deception and cunning nature of some people inside the family rips it apart into pieces and that is the exact reason why I haven't seen one of my maternal aunts till now!(Anyway, That's another long story!) Grandpa lost his own beautiful house in this gambling of others! At this time, Mom was doing her second year BSc in MES college. (Even I did my pre-university at the same college :D)
Every father's thought of crossing all her daughters to safe house (its called Marriage! here) crossed my grandpa's mind and no sooner he was into action. Dad's family had come to visit the Mom's family in Malleshwaram and like every other bollywood movie the police came with a court notice on the that same auspicious day! Grandpa somehow managed to drive off the policeman but not the situation impending in about a month. There is a saying in kannada - "Nooru sullu heLiyaadharu madhuve maadu" meaning "Do marry even if it necessitates 100 lies". God knows why they people earlier used to take so much risks! Hmmm.. Not so different in our situation where we see lots of fake love, fake assurances and fake promises. Everybody lies and many of them flirt!
Before the house was bid for sale, Marriage was successfully carried out and the last burden(!) on Grandpa's shoulder had come down. Mom said that grandpa had asked - "What is my purpose of life next? I am done with all my responsibilities", after undergoing a lot of financial and emotional turmoil in the recent years.
Then comes the most dangerous part of life called old-age where children are supposed to take care of their elders. But as the favorite inglorious quote says, "where there is a WILL only then there are family members" comes into play. Inheritance of property causes a kinda civil war between sons and no sooner did grandpa decide to move into an aashram(Old-age home) at his own willingness together with his mother. It was quite a daring task to leave the small family to join a bigger family! But with all the energy, the young spirit and his back-end support called pension, he was able to move-on. Not only did he change but he was also able bring a reform in the aashram activities. He had been to Himalayas several times with his good old friends amongst all this. He started a new wing in aashram and audited the whole of it for more than 14 years. I have been there several times when I was a small kid. I had cried and somehow managed to bring home his hand lens which was used to read newspaper by him. I now apologize for giving you a lot of trouble grandpa. Every time mom sees my elder brother in his half sleeve shirts, she is perplexed to see you standing there. No doubt everybody sees their own parents in their kids. This post is a salute to my late grandpa who has been a brave heart and yet soo kind hearted too which makes my mom often say that "He was the best papa in the world" in a childish tone :)
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Abstract dreams and subconscious mind
I am sure everyone have had some kinda dreams which makes no sense to them which they can't even recollect after getting awake but I think they have some implicit meaning behind them which we even even don't know of.
Yesterday, I had one such absurd(!) dream in which of-course, as in everybody else's dream, I was playing a lead role and as always it was highly colorful than the recent HD movies! :P
You are sure going to call me crazy after reading the whole story below :D
I don't remember where it all started. But in my dream, I was a kinda pharaoh. A bunch of other Egyptian/(or were they Roman! coz I'm not sure of the dress I imagined) guys were playing the game of cricket(!) and I was at fielding at the cover position. Not to be surprised, we were playing the game in the middle of the desert! I caught a cover drive shot diving and landed on the sand which swallowed me in as if it was quicksand. I fell into a circular concavity which led to a pathway of stairs below which inturn led into a dungeon. I saw some familiar faces been captured behind the bars and thought of rescuing them. Soon the jailer and his men attacked me to lock me in. I escaped fighting them out and saw one peculiar semi-sphere with some old odd inscriptions on it. Some resembled the shape of humans and some others were unseen unheard language writings. As I escaped and resurfaced the sand I was on the other side of the boundary line! All the fellow fielders were puzzled and asked me what had happened. I had just seen a portal to new dimension. I had traveled through space and time and broke that continuum. None believed me. No sooner everyone felt earthquake, sand storm coming. That huge semi-sphere emerged out of nowhere in the center of the pitch and storm drove us all away from the feet. Nothing to hold onto we were all in air-borne in seconds and soon I could no longer experience it turning into a nightmare, I got up.Sigh!
Human mind is really so creative. I am amazed how the brain relates our past visual experiences of books(fiction)/movies(action and thriller)/games(RPG)/dress/emotions into a nonsense dream to get the body and mind the required rest. I read articles about the understanding of sleep patterns and dreaming. I came across an interesting article which explained the REM state of sleep which does help in reprogramming the brain in offline state disconnecting us from sensory input and paralyzing the muscles of our body. The chemical locha in the brain connects a special way to reality by creating a lightning speed of perceptions metaphorically to match with whatever we choose to imagine as an environment. But I am surprised to see how I remember so much of my dream. Most of the dreams are meant to be forgotten by the time we get up but I made myself aware that I am dreaming which somehow got a connecting link between the subconscious and conscious in the cortex of the brain!
Why do I think a lot even about bizarre dream!? anyway, Good night and Sweeeeet dreams :)
Yesterday, I had one such absurd(!) dream in which of-course, as in everybody else's dream, I was playing a lead role and as always it was highly colorful than the recent HD movies! :P
You are sure going to call me crazy after reading the whole story below :D
I don't remember where it all started. But in my dream, I was a kinda pharaoh. A bunch of other Egyptian/(or were they Roman! coz I'm not sure of the dress I imagined) guys were playing the game of cricket(!) and I was at fielding at the cover position. Not to be surprised, we were playing the game in the middle of the desert! I caught a cover drive shot diving and landed on the sand which swallowed me in as if it was quicksand. I fell into a circular concavity which led to a pathway of stairs below which inturn led into a dungeon. I saw some familiar faces been captured behind the bars and thought of rescuing them. Soon the jailer and his men attacked me to lock me in. I escaped fighting them out and saw one peculiar semi-sphere with some old odd inscriptions on it. Some resembled the shape of humans and some others were unseen unheard language writings. As I escaped and resurfaced the sand I was on the other side of the boundary line! All the fellow fielders were puzzled and asked me what had happened. I had just seen a portal to new dimension. I had traveled through space and time and broke that continuum. None believed me. No sooner everyone felt earthquake, sand storm coming. That huge semi-sphere emerged out of nowhere in the center of the pitch and storm drove us all away from the feet. Nothing to hold onto we were all in air-borne in seconds and soon I could no longer experience it turning into a nightmare, I got up.Sigh!
Human mind is really so creative. I am amazed how the brain relates our past visual experiences of books(fiction)/movies(action and thriller)/games(RPG)/dress/emotions into a nonsense dream to get the body and mind the required rest. I read articles about the understanding of sleep patterns and dreaming. I came across an interesting article which explained the REM state of sleep which does help in reprogramming the brain in offline state disconnecting us from sensory input and paralyzing the muscles of our body. The chemical locha in the brain connects a special way to reality by creating a lightning speed of perceptions metaphorically to match with whatever we choose to imagine as an environment. But I am surprised to see how I remember so much of my dream. Most of the dreams are meant to be forgotten by the time we get up but I made myself aware that I am dreaming which somehow got a connecting link between the subconscious and conscious in the cortex of the brain!
Why do I think a lot even about bizarre dream!? anyway, Good night and Sweeeeet dreams :)
Sunday, November 8, 2009
I think, therefore I am single.
The title had been one of my status messages in the google talk in the recent past. Not surprisingly, I received all kinds of strange comments but the thing which interested me most was that I had a long argument over chat with one of my good friend over this "non-marital status" message :P
In India, as Chetan bhagat's latest novel says, Indian weddings are not like other love marriages around the world - Boy loves girl. Girl loves boy. Boy's famliy has to love girl. Girl's family has to love boy. Girl's family has to love boy's family. Boy's family has to love girl's family. If girl and boy still love each other(after all the turbulent-highly-emotional-melodrama between the families) then they can get married :D
The argument with my friend ignited over the assumption that I am not a strong believer of love marriages! Actually I am happy being single now. I have lots of time to spare on things which I have cool passion. Some people think I am crazy teetotaler owning a royal enfield bullet which seems to be like practicing two contrasting customs in the world. I am happy exploring the world around me. I am happy at work and looking ahead for a great career in which I am certainly making good progress. I am contented with all that I got except for knowledge. To me I am the most happiest person on this world! I love myself than any other person in this world. I have not (yet) met that someone who I can back on/whom I back on emotionally with all the care in the world.
In India, as Chetan bhagat's latest novel says, Indian weddings are not like other love marriages around the world - Boy loves girl. Girl loves boy. Boy's famliy has to love girl. Girl's family has to love boy. Girl's family has to love boy's family. Boy's family has to love girl's family. If girl and boy still love each other(after all the turbulent-highly-emotional-melodrama between the families) then they can get married :D
The argument with my friend ignited over the assumption that I am not a strong believer of love marriages! Actually I am happy being single now. I have lots of time to spare on things which I have cool passion. Some people think I am crazy teetotaler owning a royal enfield bullet which seems to be like practicing two contrasting customs in the world. I am happy exploring the world around me. I am happy at work and looking ahead for a great career in which I am certainly making good progress. I am contented with all that I got except for knowledge. To me I am the most happiest person on this world! I love myself than any other person in this world. I have not (yet) met that someone who I can back on/whom I back on emotionally with all the care in the world.
Coming to argument of love marriages v/s arranged marriage, a dozen points/questions I listed are here :)
1. Arranged marriages are like contracts and one should spend life in fulfilling it.
2. Being in love doesn't mean losing freedom.
3. Parents have come a long way from 19th century and today individuals matter rather than caste, creed, religion.
4. Love marriages give you ample time before hand in choosing the right person.
5. Can't you fall in love with your partner after marriage?
6. Is it worth taking the risk to try bonding a relationship of feelings after marriage?
7. What if love is just a kind of euphoria which blinds you from his/her real truth?
8. How much is sufficient time to know a person beforehand to fall in love with?
9. What do you see in a person to fall in love?
10. Does one really have time to find that special someone in the midst of finding a career and work-pressure?
11. Does love happen only once in lifetime!?
12. Does love/arranged really matter after a few years of any kind-of marriage? ( since I see all couples fighting over taking care of kids, doing daily chores in kitchen and even buying groceries which get rotten in refrigerator!? :P )
Actually in this debatable topic, someone had to take each side otherwise there would be nothing to chat and discuss about :P so I unfortunately took "against" and landed up in position where I couldn't put-forward my argument sometimes irritating/leg-pulling my friend and going off topic. But that was hell lot of churning out our minds.
So awaiting for comments from other readers and their typical-middle-class-Indian views on the same ;)
1. Arranged marriages are like contracts and one should spend life in fulfilling it.
2. Being in love doesn't mean losing freedom.
3. Parents have come a long way from 19th century and today individuals matter rather than caste, creed, religion.
4. Love marriages give you ample time before hand in choosing the right person.
5. Can't you fall in love with your partner after marriage?
6. Is it worth taking the risk to try bonding a relationship of feelings after marriage?
7. What if love is just a kind of euphoria which blinds you from his/her real truth?
8. How much is sufficient time to know a person beforehand to fall in love with?
9. What do you see in a person to fall in love?
10. Does one really have time to find that special someone in the midst of finding a career and work-pressure?
11. Does love happen only once in lifetime!?
12. Does love/arranged really matter after a few years of any kind-of marriage? ( since I see all couples fighting over taking care of kids, doing daily chores in kitchen and even buying groceries which get rotten in refrigerator!? :P )
Actually in this debatable topic, someone had to take each side otherwise there would be nothing to chat and discuss about :P so I unfortunately took "against" and landed up in position where I couldn't put-forward my argument sometimes irritating/leg-pulling my friend and going off topic. But that was hell lot of churning out our minds.
So awaiting for comments from other readers and their typical-middle-class-Indian views on the same ;)
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Honing my Kannada writing skills
Here is my one more attempt in writing a poem in my mother tongue.
This post is dedicated to that "Gelathi"(Friend/Alter ego) whom I have not yet met in my life till now :)
ಬಿಳಿಯ ಹಾಳೆಗೆ ಏನೆಂದು ಹೇಳಲಿ ಮನಸಿನ ತೊಳಲಾಟ.
ಲೇಖನಿಗೆನು ಗೊತ್ತು ಈ ನಿನ್ನ ಸಖನ ಪರದಾಟ.
ಭಾವನೆಗಳು ಆವಿಯಾಗುವಾ ಮುನ್ನ ಕಾವ್ಯವಾ ರಚಿಸಿದೆ,
ಆ ಮಧುರ ಕ್ಷಣಗಳ ಮೆಲುಕು ಹಾಕಿದೆ, ಮನಬಂದದ್ದು ಗೀಚಿದೆ;
ಆದರೆ ಅದರ ಸವಿ ಹಂಚಲು ಇಲ್ಲಿ ನೀನಿಲ್ಲ, ಅದು ಈಗ ಖಾಲಿ ಹಾಳೆಗೂ ಗೊತ್ತಿದೆ.
-----------------------------------------------------------(13-10-2009 23:58 hrs)
This post is dedicated to that "Gelathi"(Friend/Alter ego) whom I have not yet met in my life till now :)
ಬಿಳಿಯ ಹಾಳೆಗೆ ಏನೆಂದು ಹೇಳಲಿ ಮನಸಿನ ತೊಳಲಾಟ.
ಲೇಖನಿಗೆನು ಗೊತ್ತು ಈ ನಿನ್ನ ಸಖನ ಪರದಾಟ.
ಭಾವನೆಗಳು ಆವಿಯಾಗುವಾ ಮುನ್ನ ಕಾವ್ಯವಾ ರಚಿಸಿದೆ,
ಆ ಮಧುರ ಕ್ಷಣಗಳ ಮೆಲುಕು ಹಾಕಿದೆ, ಮನಬಂದದ್ದು ಗೀಚಿದೆ;
ಆದರೆ ಅದರ ಸವಿ ಹಂಚಲು ಇಲ್ಲಿ ನೀನಿಲ್ಲ, ಅದು ಈಗ ಖಾಲಿ ಹಾಳೆಗೂ ಗೊತ್ತಿದೆ.
-----------------------------------------------------------(13-10-2009 23:58 hrs)
Monday, November 2, 2009
Transitions - From a boy to man
Disclaimer : This post has no biblical/spiritual references and has nothing to do with mere physical biological developments in the changes during adolescence. Its yet-another-blurt-in-my-mind (Just my version, to be precise) about how thoughts of a boy mature in adulthood. I personally feel that it is not a "mature content" as you will come to know when you read.
Ok.. Here I go...
An innocent kid metamorphoses into a teenage boy at coeducation high school and has a lot of good friends but less of other gender. He doesn't understand what his feelings are to a person next to him. He is totally mistaken by the silly crush on her classmate as love-at-first-sight even though he does not truly know what love is! It can be just called a mere way to get attraction of opposite sex towards him as all the hormonal changes conspire to say the same. If they both get so ardently devoted to each others' puppy-love they get doomed in studies and spoil their future and end up exactly opposite to the fairy tale they often listen to, which surprisingly always ends happily-ever-after!
Some days later the boy realizes the fact that she-was-not-the-one! after having two,three or more... crushes. After all it is yet-another-testosterone-charged body. I don't blame it.
Soon he is into watching a lot of movies which create illusions of real life. Then comes the posters of actress all over the room walls/wallets. No, I don't say he is a corrupt brat! He has just another confused adolescent about his way of thinking about opposite sex. He has to be channelized to spend his energy in the right direction and major responsibility is on the head of parents, his best friends and chunk of the society around him.
Everyone around does a pretty good job in helping him overcome the distractions of his age. If not the poor chap turns pervert, addicted and what not!
He is forcefully somehow made to think ahead of time that education is the first insurance for his life and having no other choice he surrenders himself to suffer a lot of difficulties in college called course-work! but yet his eyes are roaming around the starving college campus in search of "Miss right".
He gets to meet a lot of other students who think very much alike and develops a good rapport and finds "cool" friends to hang out with. He learns a lot from their company and develops sensibility of what is good and bad in society.
By now the emotional quotient(EQ) would have attained particular stage enough to relate to and respect peers. He seems to connect to the emotional signals of the girls and connects to them in a proper way. (Somehow a girl's EQ develops a lot faster than boys maybe its the effect of earlier puberty!)
P.S. After graduating from the college he enters the industry with a formal Raymond's attire to become...... "A complete man" :P
Ok.. Here I go...
An innocent kid metamorphoses into a teenage boy at coeducation high school and has a lot of good friends but less of other gender. He doesn't understand what his feelings are to a person next to him. He is totally mistaken by the silly crush on her classmate as love-at-first-sight even though he does not truly know what love is! It can be just called a mere way to get attraction of opposite sex towards him as all the hormonal changes conspire to say the same. If they both get so ardently devoted to each others' puppy-love they get doomed in studies and spoil their future and end up exactly opposite to the fairy tale they often listen to, which surprisingly always ends happily-ever-after!
Some days later the boy realizes the fact that she-was-not-the-one! after having two,three or more... crushes. After all it is yet-another-testosterone-charged body. I don't blame it.
Soon he is into watching a lot of movies which create illusions of real life. Then comes the posters of actress all over the room walls/wallets. No, I don't say he is a corrupt brat! He has just another confused adolescent about his way of thinking about opposite sex. He has to be channelized to spend his energy in the right direction and major responsibility is on the head of parents, his best friends and chunk of the society around him.
Everyone around does a pretty good job in helping him overcome the distractions of his age. If not the poor chap turns pervert, addicted and what not!
He is forcefully somehow made to think ahead of time that education is the first insurance for his life and having no other choice he surrenders himself to suffer a lot of difficulties in college called course-work! but yet his eyes are roaming around the starving college campus in search of "Miss right".
He gets to meet a lot of other students who think very much alike and develops a good rapport and finds "cool" friends to hang out with. He learns a lot from their company and develops sensibility of what is good and bad in society.
By now the emotional quotient(EQ) would have attained particular stage enough to relate to and respect peers. He seems to connect to the emotional signals of the girls and connects to them in a proper way. (Somehow a girl's EQ develops a lot faster than boys maybe its the effect of earlier puberty!)
P.S. After graduating from the college he enters the industry with a formal Raymond's attire to become...... "A complete man" :P
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